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'Today' show's Dylan Dreyer opens up about miscarriage and secondary infertility struggle
The 'Today' show meteorologist and her husband decided to talk about their struggle to have a second baby in an effort to get rid of the stigma attached to secondary infertility.
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Separate your needs from those of your children. They can’t live your dreams.
In the midst of blissful baby news from colleagues Hoda Kotb and Jenna Bush Hager , "Today" show meteorologist and 3rd hour co-host, Dylan Dreyer opened up about a less-talked-about side of pregnancy: secondary infertility.
The 37-year-old mom said that she and husband Brian Fichera had been trying for six months to conceive a second child before they sought help from doctors.
The couple decided to share their very personal story in an effort to shut down the stigma, Dreyer said.
"I just want people to know that I'm going through it, too."
It's the start of National Infertility Awareness Week and @DylanDreyerNBC is sharing her own family's struggle with secondary infertility and miscarriage to help shed the stigma. #3rdHourTODAYpic.twitter.com/RDNop99GFb— TODAY (@TODAYshow)
What is secondary infertility?
Dreyer said that the couple is struggling with secondary infertility.
The term used to describe the inability to become pregnant or carry a second baby to term after previously giving birth to a baby.
Know the value of face-to-face communication. Very young children learn best through two-way communication. Engaging in back-and-forth "talk time" is critical for language development. Conversations can be face-to-face or, if necessary, by video chat with a traveling parent or far-away grandparent. Research has shown that it's that "back-and-forth conversation" that improves language skills—much more so than "passive" listening or one-way interaction with a screen.
Dreyer and Fichera share 2-year-old Calvin, whom Dreyer said they got pregnant with right away.
The Mayo Clinic says that the causes of second infertility could range from damaged sperm production, uterine conditions, complications with prior pregnancies or changing factors (age, weight, medication).
In Dreyer's case, she said that her blood work showed that she has a very low egg count. She also had significant scarring on her uterus from the emergency cesarean section she underwent while having Calvin.
After undergoing a procedure to clear the scar tissue, the couple got pregnant right away. However, that pregnancy ended in miscarriage, Dreyer revealed tearfully.
The couple will try IVF next
Dreyer and Fichera explained that they want to create more awareness about secondary infertility and to ease the guilt of wanting a second child when others are struggling to have their first.
While she said she is incredibly happy for Jenna Bush Hager, who just announced she is pregnant with baby No. 3 , Dreyer said, "This is my world."
She explained, "My sadness doesn't take away from anyone else's happiness and my sadness isn't minimized because someone else has a sadder situation."
Read books together every day. Get started when he's a newborn; babies love listening to the sound of their parents' voices. Cuddling up with your child and a book is a great bonding experience that will set him up for a lifetime of reading.
Now the couple plans to pursue in vitro fertilization, which Dreyer will write about on Today.com .
Dreyer didn't know she wanted to be a mom
Earlier this year, Dreyer said that before getting pregnant with Calvin, she and her husband had been happy with their lives and didn't think they wanted kids.
“I was actually pretty open with it when I was pregnant with Calvin. Really scared to death," Dreyer recalled. "My life’s going to change. I never changed a diaper before. I really didn’t know how to be a mom."
Then, she said, "I had Calvin, and something clicked."
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