"Do not invent untruths to judge someone, let alone a woman who every day, at all times, gives up her own life to live the life of another being that she knows is much more important than her."
Mental health: How to talk about it with someone who needs help
Mental health: How to talk about it with someone who needs help 00:17:26
Judgement is everywhere. It's even more prevalent now so much of our lives are shared on social media.
One mum will write a post about the struggles of being a parent and she's bombarded with comments about contraception and people educating her on the ways she could have prevented children if she didn't want them.
People complain about their jobs all the time without quitting. After all, everyone has a bad day from time to time, and we're all entitled to vent. It doesn't mean we regret applying for the job, or wish we were unemployed - just as mums who complain aren't confessing they regret having kids.
One mum has shared a post to Facebook calling for the judgement to end, and asking people to simply understand that expressing frustration isn't necessarily an admission of regret.
Charity's post has over 765,000 shares. Image: Facebook/Charity Beth .
"That's all she meant"
Charity Beth, mum of two and birth doula, wrote, "When a mother says she's tired, that's all she meant!"
"She did not say she wants to drop her son and forget that he or she exists."
Likewise, if she were to declare that she needed some down time from being a mother, it doesn't mean she regrets her decision to have children.
Or when she asks for help, she's not saying she is "incapable", or when she cooks noodles for dinner, it doesn't mean it's a nightly occurrence.
Charity goes on to say the mother who has a disorganised home may be the queen of organisation any other day. Or the the mum who voices the need to get out with her friends doesn't wish she was single. The mother who is afraid isn't necessarily a coward.
"When you listen to a mother screaming," Charity wrote, "it doesn't mean she just screams, probably she has spoken 300 times with normal voice tone."
Charity reminded people, "There is a whole context, a whole situation." With this in mind, we should never use that one brief scenario to judge anyone.
"Do not invent untruths to judge someone," she wrote, "let alone a woman who every day, at all times, gives up her own life to live the life of another being that she knows is much more important than her."
"Respect the child. Be not too much his parent. Trespass not on his solitude." -Ralph Walso Emerson
"In the world there is no human being able to give up and donate as much as a mother! And they deserve a lot of understanding and fewer trials."
She deserves more understanding. Image: iStock.
"So very true"
The post has been shared more than 765,000 times and attracted over 463,000 reactions.
"Love this!" commented one person, who added, "This post hits it spot on."
Another said, "Thank you for this. Beautifully said and so very true."
We have to agree. We're all entitled to vent our frustrations at times, but that doesn't mean we regret having our babies, or choosing to stay at home and raise them, or return to work early, etc.
Just offer a shoulder and an ear to someone who needs it, or even ask them if there's anything you can do to help them through their tough day, but hold the judgement because it's almost always unnecessary.